Slide

“Easier said than done.” How often have you heard that? I’ve said it myself many times, but I don’t really reflect much on its truth until push comes to shove and I find myself stuck between theory and practice.

In theory, finally talking about and sharing my experience with alopecia will free me from this burden of secrecy (and shame) that I carry for something I cannot control. It could open new doors for depth of relationship, vulnerability, and sharing with friends and others. It could allow me to live more openly, even comfortably, with something I deal with every minute of every day.

In reality, I am finding this Band-Aid pretty hard to rip off. I go to tell even my closest friends about this blog and find myself holding back. I open my mouth with a plan to be brave and tell someone about my alopecia, but the words stick in my throat and I walk away feeling disappointed by the burden but also relieved by the reprieve.

I know that I won't be able to put this genie back in the bottle, and I’m not totally sure what I’m going to unleash. It feels like I'm hovering at the top of a slide, and I’m finding it harder than anticipated to push off and begin the ride.